The Murky Fringe: How do you feel about people citing you metaphorically?
Inertia: Honestly, when people talk about having a problem with inertia in their relationship, it hurts. They’re not out-of-line per se, but having your name associated with the stalled progress between two individuals, well, of course it takes its toll.
MF: It’s guilt by association then.
Inertia: Well, no. This is not a matter of culpability. Hopefully, no one would blame me when two people either lose interest in one another or fail to make courageous choices in their relationship.
MF: And yet your name comes up.
Inertia: It does, yes, and I think that’s unfortunate. Metaphors are great tools of understanding, but I’d be lying if I said I’m unaffected by the fact that some people believe that I literally have some hand in their emotional lives.
MF: But you do play a part in their physical lives?
Inertia: Of course. I am an object’s resistance to change in velocity. In velocity. Not in partnership or while courting or during marriage, etc.
MF: But it’s not inaccurate or inappropriate to speak of you metaphorically.
Inertia: No, I just don’t like it.
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Dammit man, this is brilliant, again! If you weren’t so happily newlywedded, I might have to ask you to marry me. Or at least take me for a drink at the local Irish pub, maybe with some curry chips.