hair lip

September 17, 2011

We used to be part of Doctors Without Borders, but those guys were assholes. We treat acne. Face and back. Mostly in South America. And don’t ask if we do hair-lip surgery. That shit’s for surgeons and fucked-up dentists.

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Be Not Proud: Excerpts From Awkward Eulogies

October 14, 2009

First of all, Alison, I really appreciate the opportunity to memorialize your brother. I know there were others to consider, but you chose me and I’m grateful. It’s a privilege, really, a once-and-a-lifetime chance for a guy like me. And to think that you, Alison Baker, Homecoming Queen, would pick me, Seth Armiston, well again, [...]

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