Posts tagged as:

mother

Right Hook

February 19, 2010

My toddler punched me in the face today outside of Barnes and Noble. She wanted a book and I said no. I was squatting down to explain that since she had just received a book the day before that she couldn’t have another one so soon, until she’d read the first one. In fact, I [...]

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14 Reasons Why I Shouldn’t Confess My Feelings to My Adopted Sister from Brazil

February 9, 2010

Alandra already has a boyfriend back in Sao Paulo. I’m not ready to take on a second language. My grandmother hates Argentina, and she’ll never learn the difference. It might be interpreted as a sign of severe penile disfunction in her culture. Alandra already has a girlfriend back in Rio. I’m never going to love [...]

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Portrait Gallery

February 2, 2010

Every year they were together, my father had a portrait painted of my mother. Each of these portraits was done in a different style, using different artists. Some of the artists had her wear costumes, some had her close her eyes or turn her head away. She agreed to this each year because my father [...]

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Tina’s Recipe for Delicious Hot Wings

January 29, 2010

SERVES 12 4 tablespoons butter 6 dozen chicken wings 2 bottles hot sauce 2 gallons frying oil First, you need to melt that butter in a large saucepan. If you don’t have a saucepan, borrow one from your sister-in-law who never gives you enough credit as a cook. Tell her you’re making souffles. She’ll squint [...]

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Brass Knuckles

January 10, 2010

I didn’t know my sister was interested in our mother’s brass knuckles until we were going through the will together and there was no mention of them at all. Despite our similarities, my sister and I were not competitive. In fact, in most cases if I knew she wanted something more than me, I would [...]

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